Perspective on Loss: Should Bjorn spend his remaining time savoring what he has or preparing for what comes next?

By EpictetusRelationships & Social Skills2 min readGrade 9.2
Classroom
Intermediate

Overview

If a child has to move away from a friend, instead of feeling like they have lost that friendship, they can think of it as a chance to cherish the memories and look forward to new friendships in a new place.

The Choice

Should Bjorn spend his remaining time savoring what he has or preparing for what comes next?

Quick Stats

Grade Band
Grades 6-8
Reading Level
Level 9.209375000000001
Word Count
320 words
Published
Mar 23, 2026

The Dilemma

Bjorn and Hana are best friends who love playing soccer together. Recently, Bjorn's family decided to move to a new city, and Bjorn is feeling sad about leaving Hana and their soccer team. As they sit on the swings in the park, Hana suggests they think of this move as an opportunity for Bjorn to make new friends and join a new team, rather than losing what they have. Bjorn is torn between feeling like he's losing a part of his life and seeing it as a chance to grow. Hana tells him that they can always keep in touch and visit each other. Bjorn now faces a choice: (A) spend his remaining time deepening his bond with Hana and the team, even knowing the goodbye will hurt more, or (B) start looking forward and getting excited about the new city, even if it means emotionally pulling away from Hana sooner.

Values in Tension

This dilemma explores the tension between two important values:

Loyalty
vs
Compassion

Consider how these values might conflict or complement each other in this situation.

Your Options

A

Spend his remaining time deepening his bond with Hana and the team, even knowing the goodbye will hurt more

B

Start looking forward and getting excited about the new city, even if it means emotionally pulling away from Hana sooner

Questions for Reflection

Take a moment to consider these questions. There are no "right" answers – the goal is to explore different perspectives and develop your own reasoning.

  1. 1

    What would you do, and why?

  2. 2

    How does thinking of moving as returning something change the situation?

  3. 3

    What are the possible consequences of each choice?

  4. 4

    How might Epictetus advise Bjorn here?

  5. 5

    Turn & tell: What would our class consider the proper action here, and why?

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Philosophical Perspective

Insights from Epictetus

Take a moment to form your own thoughts first, then click to explore philosophical perspectives.

Related Topics

friendship
perspective-taking
resilience
Portrait of Epictetus

Epictetusc. 50-c. 135

Epictetus (c. 50 – c. 135 AD) was a prominent Stoic philosopher who began life as a slave in Phrygia. After gaining freedom, he taught philosophy in Rome and later established a renowned school in Nicopolis. Though he wrote nothing, his teachings, recorded …

Stoicism
The Dichotomy of Control (what is in our power vs. what is not)
Prohairesis (Moral Choice/Volition) and the Correct Use of Impressions
Explore how Epictetus informs this dilemma and discover additional ethical puzzles shaped by their ideas.
Learn more about Epictetus or continue exploring dilemmas inspired by their philosophy.

Lesson Plans

Quick Fire5 min

Perspective on Loss — 5-10 minutes

Learning objectives:

  • -Identify the core ethical tension
  • -Make a quick, reasoned choice

Discussion prompts:

  • 1.Which option did you choose, and why?
  • 2.What would you give up with each choice?
participation
Standard15 min

Perspective on Loss — 15-20 minutes

Learning objectives:

  • -Identify competing values
  • -Articulate trade-offs

Discussion prompts:

  • 1.What would you lose by choosing each option?
  • 2.Is there a third path?
participation