The Dichotomy of Control: Talia must choose between helping Chen or focusing on her own work.

By EpictetusRelationships & Social Skills2 min readGrade 8.6
Classroom
Intermediate

Overview

Imagine a student preparing for a big test. They can study hard and focus on understanding the material, but they can't control whether the questions will be easy or hard. By concentrating on their preparation, they feel more confident and less anxious about the test day.

The Choice

Talia must choose between helping Chen or focusing on her own work.

Quick Stats

Grade Band
Grades 6-8
Reading Level
Level 8.631825396825398
Word Count
360 words
Published
Mar 23, 2026

The Dilemma

Talia and Chen are working on a group project for their science class. They have divided the tasks, and Talia is responsible for compiling the final report. Chen, however, is struggling with his part and asks Talia for help. Talia knows that helping Chen might mean she won't have enough time to perfect her section of the report. She also worries about the project's overall grade, which depends on both their contributions. Talia wants to support her friend but is also concerned about her own performance. She reflects on what she can control: her actions and efforts, rather than the final grade or Chen's understanding. Talia now faces a choice: (A) Help Chen with his part and risk her section being less polished, or (B) Focus on perfecting her section and let Chen handle his own work.

Values in Tension

This dilemma explores the tension between two important values:

Loyalty
vs
Responsibility

Consider how these values might conflict or complement each other in this situation.

Your Options

A

Help Chen with his part

B

Focus on her own section

Questions for Reflection

Take a moment to consider these questions. There are no "right" answers – the goal is to explore different perspectives and develop your own reasoning.

  1. 1

    What would you do, and why?

  2. 2

    How does the Dichotomy of Control apply here?

  3. 3

    What are the possible consequences of each choice?

  4. 4

    How might Epictetus advise Talia here?

  5. 5

    Turn & tell: What would our class consider the proper action here, and why?

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Philosophical Perspective

Insights from Epictetus

Take a moment to form your own thoughts first, then click to explore philosophical perspectives.

Related Topics

loyalty
responsibility
peer-pressure
Portrait of Epictetus

Epictetusc. 50-c. 135

Epictetus (c. 50 – c. 135 AD) was a prominent Stoic philosopher who began life as a slave in Phrygia. After gaining freedom, he taught philosophy in Rome and later established a renowned school in Nicopolis. Though he wrote nothing, his teachings, recorded …

Stoicism
The Dichotomy of Control (what is in our power vs. what is not)
Prohairesis (Moral Choice/Volition) and the Correct Use of Impressions
Explore how Epictetus informs this dilemma and discover additional ethical puzzles shaped by their ideas.
Learn more about Epictetus or continue exploring dilemmas inspired by their philosophy.

Lesson Plans

Quick Fire5 min

The Dichotomy of Control — 5-10 minutes

Learning objectives:

  • -Identify the core ethical tension
  • -Make a quick, reasoned choice

Discussion prompts:

  • 1.Which option did you choose, and why?
  • 2.What would you give up with each choice?
participation
Standard15 min

The Dichotomy of Control — 15-20 minutes

Learning objectives:

  • -Identify competing values
  • -Articulate trade-offs

Discussion prompts:

  • 1.What would you lose by choosing each option?
  • 2.Is there a third path?
participation